December 3, 2011

• ❦ Cherry-on-Top ❦. *edit*

  I was revisiting this old blog after watching “Elf” with the kids this evening. The first time I saw that movie I was stuck in a hospital bed. Still…… I laughed so hard at the time the kids were too worried to really enjoy the movie. Seeing the pictures I posted from the time was kind of shocking. I look like death warmed over. Very “Twilight vampire baby”…….. Sure was happy to watch “Elf” (nearly 7 years later) with that wonderful little trouble maker.

   

   

   

  4 years ago today Siobhan Noel Berry “Finally” came into our lives. She was born 6 weeks early. And we were very thankful she was able to make it that long. She weighed 4 lbs. 15 1/2 oz. ~ small….. but not my smallest.

  Jeff and I have always called her the cherry-on-Top of our Huge Colossal Sundae. She is just the perfect finishing touch to the yummy master piece of wonderful blessings *each of the children* God has allowed us to raise, nurture, and enjoy ~~~

  
  Cherry-on-Top.

  My pregnancy with Siobhan was very difficult both before and after delivery. The Lord really used that time in my life to grow me. When I look back, I do see the happy moments during that time. But when I was in the midst of those trials, I rarely saw the intended benefit. I just wanted out. I knew with my head that God was working His purposes in my life and faith prompted me to pray and to trust. Yet, during the storm I felt like I was just clinging for dear life to His character and who He IS.

  ……. No one ever feels like a spiritual giant when they’re just holding on for dear life.

  Around my 26th week, I began to have some bloody discharge…. not terribly much but enough to warrant a visit to my OB-GYN. After examining me, my doctor decided to send me to Wake Forrest Medical Center where they have a Maternal/Fetal unit. We were living in the mountains of N.C. ,at the time, and Wake Forrest was an hour and a half away.

  In the ambulance, I went for that long ride to what would become my home away from home and the beginning of my adventure with # 13.

  

  After examinations & ultrasounds, they discovered that I had placenta privia, as well as a complicating issue with scar tissue build up that was causing Shivy’s placenta to pull away from the wall of the uterus and bleed. They told me I needed to stay there in that hospital on total bed rest until she was born. I couldn’t believe it!!!

  This was devastating news. You’d have to know me, but I’ve always joked that the biggest reason I home-school is because I would miss my kids terribly if they were gone for 8 hours a day….. Back then, going to the grocery store by myself made me completely homesick for my kids.

  

  After one week there, I began a tearful plea (shameless begging) to be allowed to return. In my mind, the isolated episode wasn’t that big of a deal and it was probably due to a lot of Holiday preparations and rushing around. I cried to my doctor until she reluctantly relented. And with many cautions and phone calls to my regular doctor ,as well as, promises on my part to be a good girl; back home I went. ~~~What a feeling of freedom I had that day….. and what a joyous reunion we had back at home~~~

  So everything went along well for awhile. One night when Jeff was doing an evening shift and Jay was out bowling with friends, I decided to go to bed a little early. The older kids were playing some games in the den when I felt a sudden gush of blood. I looked down to see bright red blood all over the sheets. This time it wasn’t stopping.

  My adrenaline kicked in as I began to realize that all our drivers were gone; it was snowing outside; and we were 30 minutes from the nearest hospital. !!!! Ohhh, I began to pray like crazy!!!!!. I tried shouting to the kids in the other room, not wanting to get up because of the awful unsettling feeling of the blood rushing out of my body. Eventually they heard and complete pandemonium ensued.

  Deborah called 911 and told them, as best she could in her panicked state, what the situation was. My memory of that time is somewhat fuzzy probably because of the adrenaline but I do remember calling Jeff at the ER. The conversation went something like this:

  Nurse: “WRMC Hospital may I help you? “

  Me: “DR. BERRY, DR.BERRY, DR.BERRY !!!!!!”

  Nurse hands phone to Jeff in record time…. Seriously, like 1 second

  Jeff: “Beth Ann, What’s going on?”

  Me: “I’M BLEEDING, I’M BLEEDING, I’M BLEEDING I CAN’T TALK NOW”

  I hang up the phone.

  My fleshly pride would very much like to tell you how well I do in emergent situations…… but Proverbs 19:5 & Rev 21:8 forbid me. ~ I was incredibly *uncalm * uncool * and uncollected.

  Once again, I took the 1.5 hour ambulance drive back to Alcatraz …. I mean to Wake Forrest.

  This time the scare was so bad that I wouldn’t have dreamed of asking to go back home to the mountains. Though I was completely miserable being away from my family and JUST before the Christmas holidays.

  A couple weeks before we had been reading some books as a family by Jeremiah Denton and Jim Mulligan about their time at the Hanoi Hilton during the Viet Nam War. My mind set at the time was, “If they could do it under those circumstances then I can make it to the end….. just 12 more weeks in this place”. ~ It seems like such a completely ridiculous state of mind now. But that’s exactly how I psyched myself up for the stay in that tiny little room.

  
  Celebrating Christmas in the hospital room w/ Jeff and the kids. I was very pale and lost weight during my stay there.

  :: The good times ::

  ~ Sleep overs with the children in my little room.

  ~ Special date nights with Jeff when he’d come over after work and pick up dinner from a local place. We’d eat, watch 24 on DVDs and He’d spend the night in cot next to my bed.

  ~ So much Bible study time. Just me and God.

  ~ Reading 2 volumes on the life of George Whitefield. Amazing Man.

  ~We have’nt done much TV watching as a family, but I did indulge in Oprah (and occasionally Dr. Phil) during my stay. And really enjoyed it!

  ~Never had another bleed while I was there in the hospital.

  ~ Visiting with those nice nurses. they were a blessing.

  ~My son ,Jay, who would drive everyone back and forth every other day. What a faithful son and a great big brother to do that for us. He helped keep us together.

  :: The Bad times ::

  ~Having to have an 16 gauge needle in my arm at all times and having it rotated every 3 days. I have so many scars on my arm. I look like an I.V. drug user.

  ~Not being able to leave the hospital. I wasn’t suppose to be out of bed but I convinced my doctor to let me roam the hospital in a wheel chair once a day. “Exercise”

  ~Being alone. A lot.

  ~Having hospital food begin to look appetizing to me. :/

  ~The moments of wondering why this was happening and if it was because my love for my kids was an idol to me.

  ~Saying “Goodbye” to the kids after a visit. That was really hard.

  

  After 7 weeks without incidence, my doctor decided to release me! We scheduled a C-section at that hospital for Feb. 11th and left. We enjoyed our time together again, but I never made it to the 11th.

  On January 27th, I was talking on the phone with a friend from church when I felt that familiar gush. I quickly hung up and told one of the kids to get Jeff. This time I didn’t panic because Jeff was there and Siobhan was farther along. In the past, when they did an analysis of the blood. It was always my blood being lost which meant the tear was on “my side” of the placenta. This is good. Babies can’t afford to lose blood volume.

  Jeff drove me to the hospital half an hour away. While there, I began to contract and bleed more. My doctor did not want to deliver me there because she was worried about my having a placenta accreta and having to do an emergent hysterectomy with very little in the blood bank. I did not think I’d make the long trip to Wake Forrest.

  I went anyway.

  In the ambulance on the way there, the whole crew was praying with me. It was an old transport and had a hard time going fast but at one point I told the nurse I was bleeding badly. I could feel it. I’ll never forget the look on her face when she peeked under my blanket. ~ She told them to move it!! NOW. And they did….. with lights and sirens.

  It was at that point I prayed a prayer of complete surrender. No more kicking and crying and complaining about my circumstances. No more fretful worries about “What if” scenarios. Right then, I said, “Lord, I’m yours and so is this baby. If you want to take us home, well, that’s just fine with me.” From that point on, I didn’t care how fast we were going or when we’d get there. ~God gave me a peace.

  

  
  We call this her Paparazzi shot. ~ “Please, Dahhling’ no pictures”

  

  
  Under the table at dinner the other evening.

  
  Goofing off with Erin

  

  There is more…

  I did get post partum pre-eclampsia that went undetected while I was at the hospital. Every time they came to take my pressure, I was at the NICU.
  So they discharged me not knowing. After a week of discomfort and swelling w/pitting edema, Jeff took my pressure. 160/140……. Crazy.

  But, we’re fine now.

  And that’s the end of my “Blah blah blah” post/story about little Shivy Noel. ~Time to go get ready for a Birthday party…. for my little miracle.

  • 8:57 pm
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